Where have you been? Where have you gone? Where are you, MOTIVATION, INSPIRATION, and PASSION? I know it is still there, too far maybe! Seems to have none of it right now :'( I put everything away. Maybe for a while. Ohhh Allah, help me! I can't help myself at the moment but to compare this and that. To compare myself with my peers. Feeling down, low, demotivated, just name it. And yes, these 2/3 weeks weren't that good. I have to change. I need to find myself back. Just yesterday, I realized that I should be grateful for all the things that happened to me.
I think that I am having a hard and rough times now, but I forgot that there are many out there are having much much more difficult times that I am. Ouchhh. Easier for the people to say, Be strong! Thank you, I appreciate it. I know I am the one who has to go though everything. You are fortunate enough, Aina! YES YOU ARE! Remember that. These hard times shall passed. However, through all these what I am enduring right now, I am glad that I could reach this far. Allah has given me the strength that I needed to continue this journey. Everything happen for a reason. Be grateful, always pray to Allah, ask Him for everything! Kau kena bangkit. There is hope :') Esok masih ada, insha allah!
I might have chosen the path that have less travelled by. PERHAPS!
Pastinya ada sebab. Pastinya ada sinar.
Aku nak lihat bila semua ini berakhir, aku akan tersenyum. PUAS~
Hello, people. It is Sunday. It is already December. Few days more to bid farewell to 2016. Yeah, 2016. Coming to an end of this 2016, I asked myself. What have you done in 2016? What have you achieved in 2016? I shared and asked the same thing to my friend who is close to me here in USM, Athirah! We were like, WHAAAAATTTTT???? Athirah said something like this, 2016 adalah satu-satunya tahun yang aku tanya balik, apa yang aku buat dalam hidup aku? Same goes to me, 2016 was not so good in term of achievement. A bit plain and boring, bumpy and sloppy, or even emotional roller coaster ride to me. Of course there are some good things in it, right? Gembira dengan kejayaan orang sekeliling, getting to know more new people, and some are your close friends now. That is all blessings I would say.
Okay now, turning 25 next year in 2017, of course I hope the year will fill with more happy moment or perhaps something magical :') However, my fears: not being able to fulfill my dream, not being able to support my parents, not being able to have an occupation... BUT BUT BUT... I always always tell myself, you have to work hard and leave the rest to Allah to decide. He knows what is best for you. As for now, I am trying to make things work. First and foremost, of course this study and dissertation thingy need to be done before I can proceed with my other wishlist or whatsoever so called my too long bucketlists! HAHA. 2017 is the year. I HAVE TO WORK ON ACCORDING TO MY PLAN. Of course, to graduate, back to Kuala Lumpur living with parents, look after them, get a good and decent job! (Pray for me, people).
At the age of 24/25 years, I think most of us including me is fighting with own self. Having a hard times -.- A lot of advice people will throw to you, and some could be encouraging and some could be useless. Nehhhhh! But for one thing, in getting something you want, you need to gave up on something. Sad enough! You have to fight some bad days to earn the good things in your life. At this very moment, I just hope, I am not losing myself, and we will have strength to pull through everything. Past is past.
I shall stop.
Tomorrow, I have to submit my assignment.
I don't have so much time but still able to write here.